God wants what is best for us, and that is why He has given us a rule of law. God’s gracious favor is found in every command and prohibition. His statutes are "for our good always" (Deut. 6:24; 10:13). We must "walk by faith" (2 Cor. 5:7). "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding" (Prov. 3:5).

In Mark 10:11-12, Jesus teaches, "Whoever divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her; and if she herself divorces her husband and marries another man, she is committing adultery." This is the general rule of marriage and divorce. There is one exception given to the one who divorces an unfaithful spouse (Matt. 19:9; 5:32) – "except for the cause of fornication." If this exception had not been given, then the general rule would always apply. We must never construe the exception so as to turn it into the general rule. When we make application of Biblical principles, we can either handle accurately the word of truth (2 Tim. 2:15), or we can distort the scriptures to our own destruction (2 Pet. 3:16). The exception clause of Matthew 19:9 was never intended to be a loophole for someone looking for a way out.

QUESTION: May one who has divorced a spouse or consented to a divorce for reasons other than fornication remarry without sin when his spouse commits fornication after the fact?

We might wish to answer YES, or at least give the benefit of the doubt, in cases where the party in question contested the unscriptural divorce and fought every step of the way to keep his marriage intact. Our sympathies might be with him all the more if his spouse filed for divorce in order to consort with someone else. But this is not the scenario we are considering. The party in question, far from contesting an unscriptural divorce, either initiated it or agreed to it.

Our answer must be NO on the following grounds:

1. The divorce itself was wrong (Matt. 19:6; I Cor. 7:10-11). Remarriage compounds the sin and makes matters even worse (Matt. 19:9).

2. When a person divorces a spouse for reasons other than fornication, he puts a stumbling block before his spouse and is partially responsible for any subsequent adultery the spouse may commit (Matt. 5:32). How could he pretend to be an innocent, wronged victim of a partner’s unilateral shame, and use that as grounds for remarriage? (Rom. 3:8; Jude 4; Rom. 6:1-2). When your sin results in someone else’s violation of the marriage covenant, you forfeit any pretext for remarriage on the basis that they are in the wrong. Two wrongs don’t make a right!

3. Fornication by itself is not grounds for remarriage. Many people have forgiven unfaithful spouses and patched up their marriages. Only a putting away for the cause of fornication enables the wronged party to remarry (Matt. 19:9). When the putting asunder is for some other reason, then the parties involved forfeit any legitimate appeal to the lone exception. The general rule applies.

4. In fact, Luke 16:18, by implication, indicts both original spouses upon remarriage under the general rule. Both the one "who divorces his wife and marries another" as well as the third party "who marries one who is divorced from a husband" commit adultery. No hope is held out to the one who can play the waiting game and hold out the longest!

5. When a person separates himself from his spouse in violation of the will of God, he has only two options (I Cor. 7:10-11): a) remain unmarried, or b) reconcile. Remarriage is not a legitimate option.

We must not play games with Holy Scripture (Gal. 6:7-8; Num. 32:23). Don’t look for a loophole when there is none. This life is too short, and eternity too long, to play footloose and fancy free with God’s Word.